I'm gonna rant EVERYTHING out here... What am I feeling inside, what am I thinking. I don't wanna act any more...
Okay, sorry for being too emotional (in this post). If you can't take it, don't read, alright! I don't want negative comments saying that I ACT PITY.
FYI, I'm gonna rant about my life (good and bad ones). AND, I'M NOT TRYING TO ACT PITY OR TRYING TO GAIN SYMPATHY FROM MY READERS. I just wanna be MYSELF. And I'm not gonna lie about anything in this post.
I'm gonna talk about my FAMILY first.
MY DAD ♥
I have a super duper AWESOME Dad. He understands me a lot. F***ING HELL LOT! He won't scold me for no reason. He gives me freedom. He gives me whatever I want. He will try to make me happy whenever I'm sad/ angry. The first time I saw him crying in-front of me, is after I've pierced my tongue. AND OF CAUSE, I CRIED TOO. He begged me to take out. But I don't want to. Cuz' I find it cool (okay, that's lame). And after I pierced my lips (months ago), he told me nicely to take it off. And his heart pain whenever he sees me doing these kind of things. And, I told him to let me play with it for awhile. I will take it out one. AND, I TOOK OUT ALREADY!!!
And I've never shouted at him before (Even though sometimes he's a bit too naggy and I feel like telling him to shut up. BUT I WON'T!! KILL ME I ALSO WON'T. HAHA). TBH, I'm a Daddy's girl, seriously. There's one time I'm sick. SUPER SICK. He took care of me. And he didn't sleep. He cooked porridge for me, bring me to see doctor which cost him around $70+. He will cook dinner for me and my brother EVERY NIGHT. And, I miss him, I miss his cooking.. My Dad is the same as me. He like to keep everything to himself and act one crazy& hyper Daddy!!!!!!!! He once told me this 'Sandy, if you have anything unhappy or feeling sad, must tell Daddy okay? I don't want you to be hurt.' My relationship with my Dad, is better than my Mum. WAY BETTER. I placed my Dad first in my heart.
And, TBH, I'm not afraid of telling anyone this. My Dad is in Jail. He's my Dad. Why should I be afraid or scared that other ppl will look down on me? And, I still keep the last msg he sent to me before going in..
My Dad sang me a Happy Birthday song when I visited him. And obviously, I cried!
I wanna tell him this. Even though he can't see this post, but, whatever!!! I wanna tell everyone.
He's the best Daddy!! :') ♥
Okay, now, my Mum.
She nags for NO REASON. She don't understand me. She treats my Brother better than me. I don't know why.. She hit me for NOTHING. She keep scolding me for NOTHING. She hates my Dad. She have a 'boyfriend' outside (idk is it or not. cuz' she dw tell me -.-). HE IS STAYING WITH US NOW AND I HATE HIM A LOT. Stupid jerk. Buey paiseh one uh (won't feel paiseh one uh)?! But anyway, I only have one mother. I don't hate her. I don't dislike her. Sometimes I do when she nags at me and hit me for NOTHING. But, not every time.. I still love her.
Okay, TBH, I did slapped her ONCE. That was when she's too much. REALLY TOO MUCH. After I was suspended from school, she nags all the way. When I wanna shower, she pull my hand, continue nagging, don't wanna let me shower. I know, it's for my own good. But, can you guys put yourself into my shoes? Imagine she nags at you for nothing, hit you when it's not even your fault? But, I learned my lesson. I won't do these kind of things any more. AND. I WON'T LET MY MUM BE WITH THAT JERK. F*** OFF OKAY. Spoil other ppl's family only.
My Dad and Mum quarrels whenever my Mum come home (last time). Mostly it's about me/ my Brother and THAT JERK -.-" .
But whatever, she's till my Mum. I love my Mum. :)
Okay. Now, my irritating lil' Brother! :)
He's irritating, nonsense and cute. Okay lah, not that cute. But he is fat (no offences to ppl out there)! HA HA. He is only P6 this year. And next year Sec1. Idk which school he wanna go also! Talking to him can really make me laugh. Cause he is full of nonsense (same as me LOL). But sometimes irritating!! Sometimes he really make me feel like hitting him!! OMG. But, he talk no link one. And he is random. He don't really go out. Cause he stays at home playing MAPLE? I don't know what's so good about it. Ha ha! He cannot tahan without FAN/ AIR-CON one. OMGEEEEEZ. He's the best brother! Ha ha. And, his laughter is reallyyyyyyyyyy.... OMG. Sometimes he's really fierce. REALLY REALLY FIERCE. x.x
I love my Brother! :)
Okay, now, I'm gonna talk about my FRIENDS.
TBH, I don't have much friends. I'm a loner. That's why I'm staying at home most of the times. But, I don't really mind if I have friends or not.
The only true friends I have, is Zoe, Gracia, Darren, James, YongAnn and Hongwei. Thanks for everything guys! Thanks for celebrating my birthday. :)
Even though they are CRAZY, I still love them! They are the only friends I can trust.
My lover.
I don't know what to say about him.. Sometimes he treats me cold, sometimes he's really sweet. I don't know.. But, I only know that, I love him a lot. The only guy-friend that I loved so much. I've never loved anyone so deep before. Cried cuz' of him for many times. I know, I'm giving myself too much hope already. TBH, this 6 months the only guy-friend I have feelings for, is only him. That means I loved him for 6 months. And that's really long. ;) . If I lose him, I'M GONNA BE HEARTBROKEN FOR LIKE DAMN LONG. But don't think wrongly. We're still friends. *but i want us to be more then that*
AND I HOPE HE WILL NEVER SEE THIS. CUZ' IF HE SEES THIS, I WILL BE LIKE DAMN PAISEH ESP THE LAST SENTANCE! OMG ><
Not gonna say who is it! :)
Myself.
Okay, to everyone, I'm a happy-go-lucky-girl. But, do you know what am I thinking or feeling inside? I don't know what's wrong with me. I cry cuz' of small things. Yes, I'mma cry baby. I've been acting as a happy girl for like............. idk how long. I think from the day I was born till now? Everyone thinks that I'm strong, I won't cry. But, you guys are wrong. Tell me which person don't cry? Even the strongest person in the world cries. I don't know what I want in life. Life is awesome. Yes, it's awesome. But, sometimes, it suck. And no body is perfect. Stop judging. I have not much friends. So? Does it means I need friends to survive? No right? And I really hope guys won't give us girls heartbreak anymore. Vice versa.
I want everyone to be happy. Esp those people that have Family problem. If you really have no one to talk to, or you really really need a listening ear, you guys can always talk to me. I'm willing to sit in front of the computer and listen to what's wrong with you guys, and try to make you guys smile. I want YOU GUYS to be HAPPY. Even without the person you love, you can still be happy. ;)
END.
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